I know that I mean nothing to her:
I might as well be dead at heart.
And so a sea of knives cuts through my flesh
Straight to the ancient roots of bone.

Her tone of voice is mockery in needles:
She adds the salt to open wounds
As one would insult to injury
And gains strength from every broken promise.

My breath is with the wind now:
An unsustainable idea at large.
I fade from grey to black to white
As childhood memories from frameless pictures.


19 thoughts on “Spikes

    • Thank you very much, but I do not even know what this is. I am going to answer those questions in a separate post, yet I should like to know what, exactly, ‘The Sun shin Award’ is. Can you help me?

  1. Have you responded to that Sunshine award? I’m surprised you have little idea about it. Isolated Girl is right; It’s gonna be fun for you. It’s similar to chain-letters thing. Many bloggers, including me, wouldn’t want at all to be the recipient of such “awards” and totally shy away from the attention. But I do hope you get to answer the 11 questions (about yourself). C’mon, I’m looking forward to what you have to say. 😉

    • I am still thinking about whether I should do it at all. I cannot stand chain letters, and thus I have never answered one. It is a miracle I am still alive, I know.
      But seriously, I cannot comply with all of the rules which, inter alia, require me to nominate more people. I have already answered the eleven questions asked by Isolated_girl, but I have not yet decided whether I am going to publish the post. I also doubt that my replies would please people, especially I need to refer to someone specific, and I usually refrain from doing so because if said person read it, they may get wrong ideas. Ironically, this person is at the same time the only person who can make me do things I am otherwise reluctant to do, and I doubt that they would do this to me. Besides, I think they have not read this weblog in a very long while, so I should be safe pointing this out here.
      (If, contrary to my assumption, you do read this, please do not make me do it. You know who you are.)

    • Now now, you’re being macaroni silly and taking the matter way too seriously — if I could just dive deep into the monitor screen so I could reach you and shake you again and again until you lighten up considerably. 😀

      Since you’ve already finished answering the questions, all you need to do is hit that Publish button and give your readers something to smile about. Oh please, drop the melodrama about that specific someone. She’d probably be just as happy to read anything from you. 🙂 😉

    • Why are you assuming that the person referred to is female? (Note to self: Be less obvious. -.-)
      Besides, I have several other posts queued to be published, so even if I should miraculously be persuaded to publish my answers to those questions, it would not happen before the end of the week.
      (I was thinking about laughing diabolically at the end, but then it occurred to me that his would only have the desired effect in person, for which reason I eventually decided against it.)

    • Well, I tend to do that more often than you would think – or would you? As I pointed out elsewhere, I like to pick up thoughts and run with them, just so as to see where they will lead me. I build these elaborate jokes by building upon the very joke someone else has just made, yet most of the time, people think I did not get their joke. I always feel a bit guilty when I have to explain this.

    • I was the one who didn’t get the depth of your joke. I wish I possessed the breadth of your mind to be able to get you all the time. Okay then, publish the said post anytime you want. Make sure, however, you answer ALL the questions with blaring honesty. he he…

    • Well, the problem with explaining jokes is that you cannot laugh about them any longer. Somehow, an explanation cancels a joke’s being funny.

      You want me to answer the questions honestly, and that is exactly where we run into issues. I am frank and honest by nature, but the questions asked touch some of my personal issues, and I am, contrary to most people on the internet, quite reluctant to give out sensitive personal information. In fact, I have given out more throughout the past couple of weeks in both posts and discussions in their respective commentary sections than I have in all the years before combined.
      There are still several posts waiting in queue to be published, so I am still left with some time to think about it.

    • “I have given out more throughout the past couple of weeks in both posts and discussions in their respective commentary sections than I have in all the years before combined.”
      I can’t think of any ensuing desolation from whatever revelations that might have been made. That you don’t have even a pseudonym to share doesn’t justify the secretiveness of it all. 🙂

      Our small banter a couple of days ago wasn’t meant to lead to this. The aim was casual and fun.

    • I cannot even think of a proper pseudonym, for that matter. Everything I have used so far is both long and complicated, just like ‘ichbindaswortistich’. Earlier, I used the pseudonym ‘Schatten der Schläfer’, the history of which is also long and complex; perhaps I am going to explain it later when I am not being pushed by people around me to stop writing. -.-
      I know that it was not meant to lead to any of this.

    • Hey, who’s pushing you around to stop writing? 😀 Definitely not me. Eh, I’m beginning to suspect you’ve commenced entering the stages of paranoia. Again, cut it out and just keep writing. 😉

      I had intended to call you Phil (bcz you’re a philosopher) but it reminded me of everyone’s doctor — the “famous” Dr. Phil. 😀

    • I was referring to the people physically around me because it was time for lunch. I have not yet entered any such state of paranoia, let alone dementia, although I have had the ever so slight suspicion that I might share Nietzsche’s fate at times despite fundamental differences between him and me.
      But then again, everyone suffers from irrational fears they cannot help, I suppose. This, then, is one of mine.
      Please never call me ‘Phil’, as I indeed associate it with Dr. Phil. How about ‘Hemisphy’ instead? It is a compound of the first two syllables of ‘hemisphere’ and the last syllable of ‘philosophy’.

    • “I might share Nietzsche’s fate at times despite fundamental differences between him and me.” Aah, you mean you’re much better-looking than him. ‘Got it. You don’t have that long weird mustache, for sure. ha ha.

      “But then again, everyone suffers from irrational fears they cannot help, I suppose.” Ha! Don’t think I can’t see you pointing a finger at me, too, Mister Hemisphy. Speaking of which… hmm, Hemisphy…sounds a bit odd. Yet it’s better than nothing. 😉

    • I assure you I was not, by any means, pointing fingers, most certainly not at you. I was not even thinking of that because it is not an irrational fear but based in real experience, traumatic or not does not matter.
      I am not going to compete with Nietzsche, anyway, most certainly not as to looks, for I consider such things silly and irrelevant. I wear a different kind of beard, anyway. 😉

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